Tuesday, September 25, 2018

The Half Way Point

We're at seven months - this little cub of ours is seven months old.
We have survived 6 months of parenthood!

Tonight he's asleep early and my husband is at work late and I've decided it's time to write. This is my way to process and to look back later when all of this feels a bit like a blur. I    am way behind on this!

I am also feeling sentimental because he's getting his first two teeth.
Who knew I would stop in my tracks and get teary eyed upon this realization? It's just one of those "big milestones" in the beginning and I feel so excited he's growing and also a bit like "how is this happening?".

If I am honest I see fresh little babies and I feel mixed. Partially I feel a fondness to the sweet, sleepy, squishy, take 'em anywhere phase. But partially I feel a bit like, "oh man, that was rough and I am glad we made it out". It's weird how I have already forgotten a bit of the crazy of those beginning weeks but it also still feels fresh and a bit scary. I've said it here before but I just had no idea what bringing home a baby would really look like and the new mom anxieties met my inability to function on little sleep in a rough way. Normally Charles is the optimist and I am the realist but he was much more mentally prepared for the challenge than I was.

Some days I feel like such a pro (I'm not - I just feel so glad I know more than I knew on day one).
Some days I feel just as anxious about new phases and what lies ahead.
I pray safety and protection over him every night. I think God for each new day.
I sometimes lay awake anxious about future decisions and how we'll raise him.

I try my best to soak up each day. Ok, not every hour. Some are hard and I want them to pass by but God is inviting me into a simplicity and presence. He's been doing this for a while but it's different now. Having a baby is definitely not simple. Taking care of home, groceries, meals, a little human, a dog, being wife, friend, business owner... This whole season isn't simple but in this season of getting to be home with my baby I am doing my best to choose presence. And while getting through each day can be complicated; there is a simplicity to sitting on the floor and playing with the same toys, reading the same books, going on the same walks, working on the next nap and doing it all over again. I am here. Somedays those moments feel really long but I feel God inviting me to slow down, say yes to the moment I am in and not rush off the next idea, place or season.

So here we are. Half way to ONE.

He is working out his first two teeth.
He is sitting, working on crawling and wanting to be independent. I try to snuggle him but he mostly wants to move about.
We are learning new rhythms and how to bring him into the ones we've already got.
We are one week from our first plane flight.
We are watching him grow and learn about the world.
We recently took our second camping trip and it was MUCH better than the first.
He still loves the fan and when we ask him where it is, he looks up!
I love seeing the joy on Charles and Rainier's face when they reunite in the evening. Papa's love for this guy gets my heart every day.
I know everyone says this about their own but we think he is the cutest and talk about it all the time (who are we?).
We're learning more and more how to be a team in the parenthood thing.

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